Somehow it's just weird.
40 more hours and i will be home with my parents.
i am in middle of happiness and sadness.
i want to go back.
i miss my parents a lot.
and i miss vietnam.
but i feel like i will be separated from my close friends.
which makes me feel real sad.

haha. but it's okay.
i will go back to Vietnam anyway.
and i will eventually come back.
so yah. i have my life.
just live it.

i have quite a few things i want to do when i come back.
recently i have been thinking what i would do when i come back.
and i have a lot of ideas.
i know i will not have the determination to do half of those.
i want to get fatter, get fitter.
try to do some practical things.
try to start doing things on my own, even when i have my parents around.
and reading, i don't want both my Vietnamese and English skill to diminish, as it is already poor to begin with.

recently i have spent much time with my friends.
eventually leading to an unhealthy lifestyle.
haha, but i had enjoyable time.
next year we won't be able to gather like this anymore.
so we try to enjoy as much as we can.
hm, really anxious to see who will be my roommate for next year.

have so many things to do.
i have no more time to slack around .
should start packing up soon.

i always like friday afternoon.
because after school, it will be the start of weekend.
because when i come back home, there will be new chapter of Naruto and Bleach waiting for me to read.
or maybe because i just like it.
or just i just don't need a reason to like anything.

today we got back the progress report.
i did quite good for the last term and i got quite high.
even though i'm proud of my result.
i still think that i need to change the way i study.
or i will never have a serious working habit.

decided to go have lunch with tung,yulong,wh,lauren,xinyi and sherryn.
it was good after all.
went back home and had a nice sleep.
then dinner, sitting with tung and daisy.
i really like tung's company.
he can be serious when it comes to his work and his plan.
but he is really lame when he's talking.
and he's totally nice.
i feel lucky to have a friend like him.

feel that i am blessed for this life.
but i'm not really deserving.
so i have to work hard so i can be worthy of what i am receiving.

oh yes, during yesterday prize presentation there was a boy named Eikichi Onizuka.
wah, i was really shocked when i heard the name.
he was just a normal primary school kid, with no really distinguished traits.
but the name reminded me of GTO.
for anyone who haven't read Great Teacher Onizuka, it is my recommendation for you as a series to read.
one of my all-time favourites.
and Onizuka is one of the best manga characters that i've known.
He does not excel in studying, he does not have a happy living.
but he has a dream to be a great teacher.
he is violent, he is silly, he is clueless.
But i like the way he does things.
because he has a dream, and he works hard for it.
he always tries his best, and finally he gains everyone's respect.
he stands up again wrongdoers, he admits his own mistakes.
the manga sounds weird, as it tells the tale of a former gang leader wanting to become the greatest teacher in the whole japan.
and i really really really like onizuka.
maybe he is just my favourite type of hero.
who pursues his dream with determination, while keeping his own morality.
read it, people. you will get a good lesson about life.

today was too much for a word to describe.
morning training as usual, tiring .
i think i'm still lacking too much.
if i can follow the fitness training i may be able to last a match.
but my technique is just plainly bad, and i really need to improve much.

the enrichment thing was so-so.
it was more than 2 hours of continuous watching music videos.
at first i thought it was okay.
but most of the videos are older than my age.
and i could not really appreciate those.
then the genres of music chosen were a bit irritating.
like the music was thumping on my eardrums.
if it was something more soothing, it would have been much better.

ate lunch and played around until the side gate open.
then came back home to wash my clothes.
at 5 i had to go for the prize presentation thingy.
it meant skipping afternoon training for me
and it was fitness some more.
hoped that it wasnt something important.

the prize presentation was quite okay.
it was realy awkward, i was like the only njc guy there(Quang is not counted since he is too insignificant muahahhaa)
and like usual, it was all raffles and nus high and hwa chong and raffles and nus high again and again..
haha but the kids were quite funny.

but there was something i didnt like at the ceremony, but since it was too trivial so just skip it.
the food there was quite nice.
but it was too little and i would definitely feel hungry later.

lol tomorrow we will get back the result.
quite of looking forward to it.
anyway i know how "hard" i have been studying, so i will never ever complain about how much i get.
i appreciate my effort much ^^

pondering about life and perspectives.
and thinking up stupid ideas

i like to stay quiet and listen to conversations
i can extract out exciting things from it
can find out more about ppl around me
or simply just to keep myself happy by happy ppl around me.
so don't ask me why i never talk.

i hate complicated things.
like the world.
it makes me to think so much.
why can't it be easier for me?
like everything will only be answered in yes and no.
and there's no question why,what,when,where,how.
when you ask for someone's name, you do not ask "what's your name?"
you ask "is your name A?" "is your name B?" blah blah
eventually you will find an yes answer.
then because it is too hard to ask anything, ppl will eventually say whatever they think, no need to wait for others to find out themselves.
and this world will be much more easier to live in!


lol, crappy.

I find myself stuck inside some undesirable circumstances.
it feels like two parties
and the basis of thinking, down to the core of thinking process
is of totally different wavelength.
it is not good to stay on either side.
it seems indistinct, but when you scrutinize down you can feel it.
and when you know it then you understand it
so what should i do?
i never want to put myself in a mess.
but it is out of my control.
just know to be careful.

damn, those days without school are really boring.
like having nothing to do at hostel.
staying the whole day only sleeping and eating.
i should find something more productive to do.

now training is the only interesting in my whole day schedule
luckily we have training the whole week or else i will be bored to death.
i really really wanna improve lah!

for the whole day i finished one manga series.
don't know why i started to read those romantic comedy manga again.
this one is also quite retarded.
but it was interesting enough to keep me occupied for one whole day

my internet is really really annoying.
seriously it sucks
it used to be quite okay, but these days it is having a lot of problems.
and it pisses me off.

got some weird feeling
dunno how to describe it
it is not bad, but not a good one either.
man, i'm being sentimental.
maybe it's because i'm too old.

and that makes me wonder who i will be in the future.
maybe a miser who knows nothing except for money.
a boring office worker who reluctantly does his work everyday to keep himself alive.
or the best, i will be a househusband who spends my whole day playing with my kids and keeping the house clean.
will it be happy, or not?
i cannot tell
but i like the househusband part.
i can think up of interesting ideas.
but i lack the determination to finish what i start

i always end up staying in one place.
fortunately the place i'm staying in is quite nice =)
but the grass is greener on the other side
never mind it, i'm not eating grass.
i'm lost and dunno what to do.
then go online and search for the walk-through lah.
i'm not good enough.
the standard of "enough" is too high!
i'm a bad person.
"bad" is only relative, and you are moving in relation to the sun, according to theory of relativity or whatsoever, so don't digress.
i want to change myself.
ehh, you are nearly 18 but you don't know how to change clothes yourself? are you a kid??

i think i'm really good at making up excuses.

I am happy with the way my life is going.
it's not really satisfying for me, but it can be considered good.
and I have only one life to live, so I'd better cherish it.
and it goes for everyone as well.
it only works for people with one life.
if you have two lives or more, you can do whatever you like with it.

friday.
Okay chem was okay.
I managed to get a score higher than what i expected, but eventually my grade is still the same.
but when you do something better than expected, you deserve a praise,man.
somehow it would feel weird to praise myself.
leave it as my mum's work to praise me then =)

the subject combi talk wasnt worth mentioning.
then from 1 to 5 was some spire thing.
I had 4 hours of fun and joy.
which was definitely not linked to spire.
i came home with my whole body aching because of soccer.
then received a message from hell.
"tmr morning training blah blah blah.."
thought that i was going to die.
then went back to the room and slept like a pig

morning.
training at school at 730.
with mr sham.
got to do intervals running
not very bad.
somehow i finished the whole thing
now very very hungry and very tired.
later i think after lunch i will sleep like a pig again

^^
monday is the chinese camp.
people will have to work hard for their coming exam
while i'm having nothing serious to do.
that should be quite boring ...

rawr. boring afternoon with no one around in the room.
it's too quiet and i don't like it.
so i just type out something so i can hear the sound of my fingers hitting the keyboard.
oh well, it is fun these days.
i am truly totally absolutely amazed with my results.
lol, for maths. all the questions that i thought i did not do properly got minus marks.
must hail the teachers for their conscientious work! did not make a single mistake!
and physics. I did badly for all the assignments.
as in all the assignments that we had to do research on it.
but somehow my last year paper pulled my grade up.
next time, if the question asks me to draw free body diagram, i will definitely draw a body with the word "free" on its face. i promise.
and even though i won't take bio next year, i am still very happy for my bio grade.
and i want to say thanks to all the hormones, all the cell divisions, all the genetic information that make me what i am today!
tomorrow will be the chem.
i cannot wait..

today i came to school at 630 to see one canoeist running around the track.
when i started to do ladder then I saw one more girl running around the track.
when we were doing suicide runs then a few more people came to run.
and when we were in middle of field training, i looked out and saw 30+ people running .
it did not seem like they also had morning training...
wah lao, those people are crazy man.

the trip to the museum was not bad.
actually i thought the museum was quite cool but the guide that leading us was going too fast.
..
no more thing to say alr.

anxiously waiting for tmr